Oct 29, 2015

     When I think about my present situation, I feel that the gift of grace and its power doesn't seem to quiet apply to my life. I'm trying to run ahead of myself and figure things out, but somehow i'm just coming up short and incomplete. The journey of my faith hasn't been the prettiest. The power that Christ has over my life has been almost nonexistent to me. I need the help to really see the hope that lies ahead of me. I need the truth to set me free from the bondage that is currently clinging to my life that I feel like I can't overcome.

I'm currently a mess..

A couple of days ago while I skimmed through the bible, I came across this verse, " For the son of Man came to seek and save the lost".| Luke 19:10|

     In that brief moment as I pondered on the scripture I realized that although it has been 3 years since I got saved, I am still feeling lost. Now to be clear the lost feeling, which i'm talking about isn't the one you might be thinking of. This type of lost is a feeling of incompleteness that's overshadowing my soul.

     At that moment it had become obvious to me: the high for me had died out, the christian music I had been listening to was becoming repetitive. To be frank I was getting bored. Every thing in my life seemed to be moving in an inconsistent cycle. Was Christ not enough ? The idea of Christ not being enough played in my head over and over again. I battled the doubt and his love and still I was finding myself unable to grasp the truth in that moment--even though I know the truth.

     And to tell you the truth, this is the time where many people fall apart and then give up. They can't deal with the inconsistencies and the not knowing in their relationship with God. The flesh seems more desirable. The things of the world seem more fun--less boring. They are tired of waiting for God to make a move in their life.

In part that is sort of how I feel.

     Of course I know the world views Jesus to be a fictional character; did the man really exist? Was he just a myth? I mean...What an unusual story that God would send his son who was actually God, to die for humanity for a sin that they committed in the first place.It seems too good to be true or just not even realistic some may say. It sounds more like a silly fictional story that could be made into a Disney movie.

     Well..this story changed my life. As I pondered some more on the scripture I realized the power of the Gospel. God came to seek me and save me. He's real. I can personally say I have experienced him and although things aren't perfect in my life his presence is tattooed across my heart.

JESUS! will always be the answer

So I know...

Even though I feel like this, this is only momentary.
For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, |2 Corinthians 4:17|

     I will overcome the bondage that has been currently placed in my life;the truth shall set me free. I know the hope that lies ahead of me will help me; that the power Christ has over my life is my reality. The journey of my faith hasn't been the prettiest but the filth in my heart will not be the death of me. Therefore, running ahead of myself will leave me incomplete if I don't rely on the power of grace.

Side note: I know there are many Christians as myself who are in this stage, where the fire that used to be in you is slowly dying out. Please don't give up, God is going to work it out. Just hold on. I'm praying for you!!

for the sake of his Love,


  1. The fact that you are sharing your vulnerability about your faith to the world shows that your desire for Jesus still burns! Although we sometimes become easily convinced to believe otherwise, it is very encouraging to know the real you vs Christ who reigns in your life. God bless you Nana❤

    1. Aww Anita thank you so much ❤😘, such beautiful words

  2. Honestly, sometimes i feel bored as well especially with Christian music, and when i read your blog post it just reminded me that we will always be somehow tempted to go back to our old ways, especially being bored on this walk and it came to me that yeah we live in this world but our goal is to be of this world.


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